Hello again,
A couple of years ago, a young man asked me an interesting question about herpes. He said he'd been with his current partner for six months and just got diagnosed with herpes. He said his partner swore she didn't cheat on him. He wanted to know if he should believe her.
My advice to the young man was, "Believe her until you have real evidence to not believe her." Herpes may not be the evidence that a partner is cheating. A person can be infected with herpes for years -- even a lifetime -- without knowing it. That's why it is possible for herpes to break out in someone whose partner has been sexually faithful.
At least 50 million U.S. women and men have herpes. One million people find out they have it every year. Millions of others have it but don't know they do. More than 40 percent of all these infections occur in our community. With so many invisible infections being passed around, herpes has become one of the common risks of being sexually active.
Of course, folks who have active herpes sores shouldn't have sex with anyone else until the sores are totally healed. But if we find ourselves with an outbreak of herpes, trying to figure out who to blame will not be helpful.
Instead, take these steps if you think you have herpes. First, see a health care provider for an accurate diagnosis. Do not have sexual contact during the outbreak. Use condoms to reduce the risk of passing the infection when you do have sex. And talk with your clinician about medications that can reduce the number of outbreaks and the chances that you will pass the infection on to others.
The herpes virus stays in the body for a lifetime. So, it's good to know that women and men with herpes can lead healthy and happy sex lives by practicing safer sex and following the good advice of their health care providers.
Herpes is just one of many sexual health issues important to our community, so I'm looking forward to talking with you again soon. Until next time, when we'll talk a little bit about chlamydia, here's to your sexual health,
Vanessa
Vanessa Cullins, MD, MPH, MBA, is a board-certified obstetrician/gynecologist and vice president for medical affairs at Planned Parenthood Federation of America.
Comments: (2)
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By: john on 11/11/2009 7:56AM
Bull, if this had been a woman putting this question to you, you would have not re-directed it in another direction. you would have supported the woman.
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By: Shawn on 12/12/2009 7:52AM
DONT TAKE IT PERSONAL
I WOKE UP THIS MORNING AT 1:36A.M AND NOT TO MY SURPRISE ALONE AGAIN. I REMEMBER IT WAS NIGHTS THAT'S I WOULD GET PISSED AND NOW I JUST LET THEM SHIT GO BECAUSE IM TIRED OF FIGHTING WITH THE DEMONS IN THE STREETS.
IT'S HARD WHEN YOU TRY TO BE A GOOD WOMAN TO A MAN THAT TRULY ISN'T A MAN HIS SELF SO WHAT DO YOU DO YOU STOP BEING THAT WOMAN BECAUSE OF A MAN LIKE YOU "JUST LIKE YOU I'VE BEARED KIDS, RAISED KIDS LOVE KIDS & HATED KIDS BECAUSE I HATED MYSELF AND COULDN'T UNDERSTAND WHY.
SO I START SEARCHING, AND ONE SEARCH LET TO ANOTHER AND ANOTHER AND ANOTHER AND A NOTHER AND THEN THAT WAS THIS MORNING AT 1:36AM WHEN I WOKE UP ALONE ONCE AGAIN SIX KIDS LATER AND HIV POSITIVE THAT I M NOT THE PROBLEM IT'S ALWAYS BEEN THE TRASH THAT I SHIFTED TRHEW SEARCHING THAT WAS THE PROBLEM.
SOMETIMES LADIES WE HAVE TO RELIEVE OURSELVES THAT WE HAVE TO LOVE OURSELVES AND LOVE OUR CHILDREN TO EVEN FIND SOMEONE WHO REALLY LOVES US BUT WILL IT BE YOU, ME OUR SOME OTHER WOMEN THAT WAKES UP ALONE AGAIN AT 1;36AM IN THE MORNING ALONE 40 YEARS OF LIFE GONE BY STRESS WRITTEN ALL OVER YOUR FACE HATE AND SO SICK TO YOUR STOMACH YOU KNOW IF YOU DIDN'T HAVE GOD YOU WOULD HAVE BLOWN YOUR BRAINS OUT OR A MAN'S DICK OFF YOU WOULD. SOMETIMES I WONDER ABOUT THE WHOLE DOWNLOW THING HOW DOES IT HAPPEN HOW DOES A MAN GO FOR A MAN BUT THAT'S ALL DEMONS A DEMON CAN FIND A DEMON AND THEY KNEW WHO'S WEAK SO THEY SUCK ON THEM AND SUCK ON THEM AND SUCK ON THEM AND THEN THEY COME. AND THEN IT'S TOO LATE FOR A WOMAN TO EVER GET A MAN BACK BECAUSE HE'S BEEN SUCKED AND FUCKED BY A DEMON HAVE YOU EVER WONDERED WHY THEY WANT THE LIGHTS OFF?? HAVE YOU EVER WONDERED WHY THEY LIKE THEIR ASS RUBBED?? HAVE YOU EVER WONDERED?? JUST SIT BACK AND THINK.
3 PILLS A DAY FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE IS HOW IM SUPPOSE TO LIVE BECAUSE OF A MAN IN THE STREETS GETTING SUCKED ON BY DEMONS IS IT FAIR TO ME NO, IS IT FAIR TO MY KIDS NO, BUT THIS IS WHAT I HAVE TO DO TO KEEP A SMILE ON MY SON'S FACE TO TRY TO MAINTAIN FROM DAY TO DAY WITHOUT COMMITTING A HAINIOUS CRIME IN PRISON FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE WE GOT TO THINK . DO YOU REMEMBER ALL THE TEXTS LATE AT NIGHT FROM BITCHES OR EVEN NIGGAS HUH?? THINK DID YOU EVER GET A GUT FEELING THAT AT THE OTHER END OF THAT TEXT, PHONE CALL, MESSAGE ANOTHER EMPTY POCKET THAT THAT DEMON THAT JUST CAME IN YOUR HOUSE YOUR KIDS HOUSE NEED TO DIE?? BECAUSE YOU KNOW HE'S A LIEING MOTHERFUCKER THINK??YOU JUST LIKE ALL OF US WILL HAVE OUR OWN 1:36 AM WAKE UP CALL AND WHEN YOU DO PLEASE REMEMMBER WHAT I SAID DONT LET IT TAKE 40 YEARS, 6 KIDS A ND A DEATH CERTIFICATE FOR YOU TO REALIZE THAT THESE MEN OUT HERE IN THESE STREETS IS FUCKING EACHOTHER AND WOW MY 1:36AM WAKE UP CALL TOLD ME THAT MY BABY FATHER HAS DIED
HOW WICKED IS THAT?? I CRIED SCREAMED SHOUTED FOR A HOURS AND NOW IM BACK BLACK WOMAN BLACK MOTHER WE STILL GOT TO GET UP AND MAN UP BE HERE FOR THE KIDS THAT WE BEAR IN THE MIST OF ME GETTING THIS HORRIBLE NEWS I WONDER DID HE WAKE ME UP AT 1:36 BECAUSE THAT'S WHEN MY PHONE CALL CAME IWOKE UP AND SOMETHING BUZZED IN MY HEAD I WENT AND CHECKED THE PISTOL TO SEE IF IT WAS RIGHT AND I WAS GOING TO LAY BACK DOWN BUT MY SPIRIT HIS SPIRIRT TOLD ME TO GET UP AND WRITE THIS DOWN I HAD TO BECAUSE NO ONLY WAS HE MY LAST REAL MAN HE WAS AGOOD MAN AND ALWAYS A RELIGIOUS MAN DESPITE WHAT HE DID TO ME OR TO OTHER WOMEN HE LOVED US ALL IN HIS OWN WAY HE TAUGHT US ALL IN HIS OWN WAY HE CHERISED US ALL AND HIS KIDS ALL OF HIS KIDS
I'LL NEVER FORGET HE TOLD ME CHINA IM GONNA GIVE YOU SOMETHING FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE I JUST SMILED WOW MY BABY AND LORD I DIDN'T ANTICIPATE WHAT ELSE, BUT YES I GOT MY SON SOMEONE THAT I RAISED FROM BIRTH AND WITH ALL OF MY KIDS BEFORE HIM I NEVER RAISED THEM FROM BIRTH THAT'S CRAZY HE TOLD ME THAT THAT'S CRAZY THAT ALL THIS HAPPENED AT 1:36 I STARTED THIS OFF AS "DON'T TAKE IT PERSONAL" BUT I END IT AS 1:36
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